Oh what a day...

     Some days it is perfectly acceptable to say "Fuck the world," go home, get into a scalding hot shower, and cry.  I think we like to deny our feelings because we think we're being selfish or irresponsible.  But there are just some days that start bad and just get worse and worse with no good end in sight.
     Its like a tornado of bad.  It just grows and grows and GROWS till everything is sucked in and everything in its path is destroyed.  And there we sit, right in the middle.  We watch it all happen, but we can't do anything.  I mean you're right in the center, you should be able to do something...but alas nothing can be done.  This tornado of negativity just continues in its destructive ways till is slowly dies away.
     I had one of those days and it sucked (not a very scholarly word, but I feel as though it is the perfect word for my day).  I was sick, worked ten hours, and at the end of the day I was told I was "a rude and inconsiderate person with no self worth."  Yup I walked to my car, closed the door, and started crying.  Sick, tired, and hurt I went home.  I turned on my shower and for a half hour I alternated between self pity and anger.
     Really it all sounds quite stupid, but I needed that time.  I needed to just focus on me and how my day had made me feel.  And really I'm still not ok.  I made it past sad.  The guy who called me rude and inconsiderate and so on is an idiot (I knew this before he insulted me).  But I am going to continue to be mad till I start feeling better and I have had some sleep.  I wasn't selfish or unproductive tonight...I was just meeting what would appear to be completely ridiculous needs...
   I don't know where I was going with this...I guess I just needed to justify my actions tonight.  Also, I think I needed to put down my thoughts where someone could potentially read them because really I don't think anyone wants to hear my silly little problems.  Anyone reading this can shut the window and walk away at any point in time.
    Now I'm just rambling.  Closing thought:  Be "selfish" and cry every once in a while.  Be mad and hurt and let that tornado go its route (within reason of course).  Some days are just bad days and there is nothing you can really do about any of it.  Not right away at least.