Yet I was told just recently that there is no such thing as a wrong feeling. There is a good feeling, a bad feeling, a feeling you let consume you, but never a wrong feeling. We feel what we feel for a reason, and no one can tell us what that reason is and tell us our feelings aren't justified.
I was told that feelings are information. They may not seem rational, but they tell us about how we are doing emotionally and spiritually. They tell us little bits about ourselves. And so to ignore them is to ignore a part of ourselves. We may not know exactly what are emotions are telling us just yet; but by ignoring them we may be ignoring something really important that will come to light at some later time.
After I was told this I swore I would never ignore my emotions ever again. I failed quite a few times before started to succeed, but once I started to actually feel all my emotions things started to get so much easier. My happiness was lasted a lot longer and the anger or sadness would dissipate naturally after a night or even a few short hours.
For example, as girls we are told that heartbreak or being upset over a boy is weak or stupid, but it isn't. One day my boyfriend really hurt my feelings. He didn't mean to and really the whole ordeal wasn't that big of a deal. It was all centered around one small, insignificant text. Yet it still hurt my feelings.
Instead of calling him up and crying and being...well a girl...I decided to sit in my room and feel hurt. I was embarrassed at being vulnerable with him and hurt that he didn't return my same feelings (and no I did not tell him I loved him over text, just in case you were wondering). And I felt those feelings. The next day I was still hurt, but it wasn't so big that is overwhelmed me. I called him later that day and was able to very calmly explain my feelings and what he had done to hurt me. No yelling or crying, just very calm talking.
If I hadn't taken that time I would probably have yelled or acted upset as a defense to cope with my very big emotions. But my emotions had already been dealt with so they just weren't that big and I had an understanding of what was a big deal and what wasn't. We worked everything out within twenty minutes and we were both better for it.
By making my emotions about me and the information they were giving me instead of blaming my boyfriend or ignoring the emotions because they were weak emotions I was able to feel them. Because I felt them they ended up being a fairly small deal. And the best part is that I didn't have to convince myself that they weren't a big deal. They really didn't feel like a big deal anymore.
That is just one, very girly, example. Yet you get the idea. Each emotion has a different life span and needs to be dealt with differently, but they all need to be felt. What a strange concept...feeling your feelings. I don't think many of us ever think about how little we actually feel and how much we suppress.
After I was told this I swore I would never ignore my emotions ever again. I failed quite a few times before started to succeed, but once I started to actually feel all my emotions things started to get so much easier. My happiness was lasted a lot longer and the anger or sadness would dissipate naturally after a night or even a few short hours.
For example, as girls we are told that heartbreak or being upset over a boy is weak or stupid, but it isn't. One day my boyfriend really hurt my feelings. He didn't mean to and really the whole ordeal wasn't that big of a deal. It was all centered around one small, insignificant text. Yet it still hurt my feelings.
Instead of calling him up and crying and being...well a girl...I decided to sit in my room and feel hurt. I was embarrassed at being vulnerable with him and hurt that he didn't return my same feelings (and no I did not tell him I loved him over text, just in case you were wondering). And I felt those feelings. The next day I was still hurt, but it wasn't so big that is overwhelmed me. I called him later that day and was able to very calmly explain my feelings and what he had done to hurt me. No yelling or crying, just very calm talking.
If I hadn't taken that time I would probably have yelled or acted upset as a defense to cope with my very big emotions. But my emotions had already been dealt with so they just weren't that big and I had an understanding of what was a big deal and what wasn't. We worked everything out within twenty minutes and we were both better for it.
By making my emotions about me and the information they were giving me instead of blaming my boyfriend or ignoring the emotions because they were weak emotions I was able to feel them. Because I felt them they ended up being a fairly small deal. And the best part is that I didn't have to convince myself that they weren't a big deal. They really didn't feel like a big deal anymore.
That is just one, very girly, example. Yet you get the idea. Each emotion has a different life span and needs to be dealt with differently, but they all need to be felt. What a strange concept...feeling your feelings. I don't think many of us ever think about how little we actually feel and how much we suppress.
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